What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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why does the man appear fat he is

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

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Why did the man scream when his dog ran into the room? Because he was afraid of dogs.

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Why aren't fish good at telling jokes? Their neural structure isn't capable of processing languages or creating a method of communicating with humans, thus they both do not know any jokes since they are incapable of understanding the concept of humour.

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Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

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An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

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What do you call a group of white males wearing hoods and setting fires? Cold

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Why did the man drop one dozen long stem roses? Because he was hit by a taxi cab

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

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what's the diferance between a boner and a lambroghini? I dont have a lambroghini

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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