knock knock... ....... no one replies.. the family is deff..

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

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Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

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Children and bretheren, stinky cheese Stinkyy cheeeese. Like this or you will smell stinky cheese in your bedroom

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A man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He has been drinking alone every day since his wife an unborn child died in an horrific car accident.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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Scrooge McDuck dives headfirst into his pool of gold coins... He breaks his neck from the impact of the landing and dies.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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A black guy, a Jew and a Mexican walked into a bar...so I didn't....not because of their race but because I had already spent all of my money at the gay bar.

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A father and his son get into an accident and are whisked away to the hospital. The father dies, and the son is brought into surgery. The doctor is rushed in, but looks at the boy and says "I can operate on this boy, his my son." How is this possible? The boy's father was a zombie.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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What headphones does the farmer use? He is going through a financial struggle at the moment and cannot afford such a luxury.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What's worse than finding your whole family dead? Nothing. Finding your family dead is terrible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops