A Jew and a German meet by chance in a bar. They exchange pleasantries and order drinks. At the end of the evening they leave, having made a friend.

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Why couldn't the cat drink his milk? Because his ears were stapled to the floor.

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Q: You know why the floor is so clean? A: Because the janitor puts a lot of hard work into it.

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What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at rhyming...... TITS

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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Anti - Jokes. com

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Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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once i was a dog and u were a flower........... i raised my leg and gave u a shower :)

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Like this if you want people to stop asking to have their jokes liked.

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y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

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Why is this website called anti joke.com? Because it has anti jokes.

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man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

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Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

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Roses are cheap Violets are on sale It's Boxing Day Please buy my flowers I really need the cash.

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What is the difference between a circle and a cylinder? dunno

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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someone tell england that a depressed guy smoking a cigarette is not a movie.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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Why can't dogs fly? Because they do not have wings.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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