A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "I just found out my wife has cervical cancer."

Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

What does a blonde say when she walks into a bar? Ow

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

sky silverstein

What do you do when your condom breaks during sexual intercourse? Get AIDS.

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

Man: Am i going to be alright? Doctor: No, you're going to die.

hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she's a woman

q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

what is the difference between a picture of brooklyn decker and my grandma....i jack off to the picture of my grandma

Whats brown and rhyme's with "Snoop?" Dr. Dre

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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