How do you kill a shark blindfolded? You untie the blindfold.

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Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

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What kind of drugs should you take when you are too stressed? Fabulous secret magic drugs, makes all your problems go away... TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! TRY IT! try it! Warning: When you take drugs, you are taking a very big DRUG.

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

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Two elderly men were sat next to a children's playground... They were there to pick up their grandchildren because their parents were at work.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Put down your barbie. Get in the car.

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a cancer patient walks into a bar and has a stroke

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Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

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1d

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What did the parents say to their kid? You're adopted and we don't love you.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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What is better than life? Nothing.

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Why can't Stevie wonder read? He can. He reads braille.

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Why didn't Suzie answer her mother? Suzie has a serious condition where she is mute and also severely deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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