Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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Two black guys walked into a bar. And they killed everybody.

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What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? What do you mean what's the difference?!?! One of them is a fucking elephant!

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

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Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a serial-rapist with links to the Black Dragon triad. Yee.

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What's better than finding a $5.00 bill on the floor? Finding the person who actually owns it.

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What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

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a one fingered leper was sitting one day on the beach playing cards. When a stranger asked to play,hide and go seak. well the oner finger leper licked his invisible finger and said "which ways the winds blowing pete. .-poot-

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So a man walks into a bar, And because he is dressed in such a way that was thought of as threatening to the general safety of the highly valued customers, he is shot eight times in the head.

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When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

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What is smarter than a blind Mexican midget of average intelligence? A genius

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An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? -Who's there? Not the girl.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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