Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

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What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

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Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

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Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

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What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Just open the damn door.

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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