How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

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What disease did Harry Styles get? 1Infection! (if you don't know, Harry Styles is 1direction's manager)

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What did one muffin in an oven say to another muffin? Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects thus incapable of sppech.

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

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0000000010000000000000001000000000000000000000011111111000000000111111000000000000000000011111000000000000011100000000000000000000000000000000100000000000000000000000000000000000000001000000000000000000000000000000000000000011100000000000000000000000000000000000000111100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001111111111111111100000000000000000000000001000000000000001000000000000000000000000001000000000000100000000000000000000000000001111111111111000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 SMILE

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how man

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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What do you call a Mexican who steals cars? John Doe, until he's been identified.

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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How many blondes can you fit in a car? About 5 if you lift the arm rest.

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Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

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Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

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An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

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A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a gun, get in the van.

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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What did the dinosaur say to the koala? Nothing because the dinosaur is extinct and both of which cannot talk.

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Wanna here a funny joke? Will is straight HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA hes gay

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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