What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

What did the zero say to the eight? I don't know,numbers are inanimate objects so they can't talk.God, what did you think?

why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

I contracted AID's from a prostitute So I went out and killed 4 gay since they are the most prominent carriers of the disease I also killed a black man I kill a black man everyday

Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

why was Michael Jackson at K-Mart? They offer high quality items at a reasonable price and lay-away during the holidays.

Whats green and has wings? grass, I lied about the wings.

Q: Why did Jesus die for our sins? A: He didn't.

What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

What's better than a stick? A stone

Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

No antijoke here.

What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I HAVE AIDS NOW YOU DO TOO

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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