A: What's that on your shoulder? B: A birthmark. A: How long have you had it? B: Don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the drug dealer get arrested? Cause he was black.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

how did harry styles get in one diretion god

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the camel climb Mount Everest? Actually, he wasn't a camel, he was a very experienced mountain climber. In any case no one really knows why he did it.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A dancer walks into a barre

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Santa stops after 3 hos

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I like my coffee like i like my women, blonde with big boobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

black people

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Three examples of how santa is gay 1) he says HO HO HO 2) he sneaks into your house at night from going down the chimney 3) he knows when u r sleeping and he knows when u r awake BONUS............. Better not pout, you better not cry, better watch out im telling u why.........SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: Whats the difference between me and a ghost? A: Ghosts arnt dolphins!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops