what time does the japanese guy go to the dentist? well his appointment was for 11:30, so he might show up approximately 5 minutes prior to the appointment time, just to make sure everything goes steadily as planned

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

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Guess what? What. This joke isn't funny

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What was Hitlers first toy? An easy back oven.

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A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

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Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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Q. Why did the child's mother tell him to clean his room? A. Because his room was messy.

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did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

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"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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