Why did Michael Jackson retire from basketball? Michael Jackson never played basketball, but was nonetheless one of the most successful musicians to ever live.

How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

Why was the man sad He wasnt i lied

There is a bunch of penguins and they fall of a cliff

A jew, a black, and a gay are walking together. The black points out a new house.

How do you have gay sex? I don't know ask Jordan Braun

Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

SUCK MY 29 AND A HALF FOOT LONG DICK BITCH JUST KIDDING............ IT IS 69 FEET LONG GIGADY

What did the spoon say to the other spoon? Nothing, it is a spoon.

The New York Giants

What's worse than the Holocaust? Six Million Jews.

"Knock knock" Come in!

What is the difference between a duck? One leg is both the same.

Why couldn't the 11-year old get into the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13.

Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

Jack, John, Justin, Joseph and Jimmy walk into a bar. They order a pint of beer and start wondering what their names have in common.

Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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