Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Will farrow now gimme your hentai"

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

What's is the worst thing america has done? Jersey Shore, We mad those idiots rich.

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

Why did the chair break? The person that sat in it was over weight

2 mentally, unstable , woman visit the cinema , and watched "The Sweeney,"they really enjoyed it

What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

Your mother is so fat she has to have her clothing specially ordered, this brought her to a massive credit card bill and made your entire family bankrupt.

whats black and goes to newy high Manyiel

why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus? Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of african decent to sit in towards the front of a bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of european decent.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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