whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

why did the black guy kill the white guy. the white guy killed his family.

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

A man and a six year old boy are walking along a path through the woods on a moonless night. "Gee mister, I'm scared!" says the boy. "You're scared?" says the man. "I have to walk back alone!"

What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

What do you call a dog with no legs? What ever you want, its still not going to come.

Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

My uncle got hit by a truck, what was the last thing to go through his mind? The drive shaft.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...