PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

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taking out the trash... at night

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Engage in a lively debate with a friend, and when they are about to stump you, respond to whatever they say next with "What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?"

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Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

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why don't bears wear shoes? because they have bear feet

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What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

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Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

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Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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What is funnier than 24? If you think numbers are funny then you could have a mental illness and that isn't quite funny.

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What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Roses are red violets are blue i have HIV you should probably get yourself checked...

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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whats worse than having ice cream and not eating it? Being lactose intolerant

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone on a chair............... Hearing one person say "its friday" then realizing that you are now singing

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Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

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what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

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Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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here's a joke... the american education society

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops