Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Will I be watching The Voice tonight? no.

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There were two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Does it feel hot in here?". The other muffin says back, "Holy crap! It's a talking muffin!".

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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Hitler has a certain "genocide-quaw" about him

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Osama bin Laden walks into a bar. Just joking, he's dead.

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ur gey

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YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

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knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

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roses are red , violets are blue, lick my dick , or lick my dick

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

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Whats fleash color fleash color and fleashcolor? a naked hobo rolling down a hill

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

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Knock knock Who's there? You're You're who? YOU'RE MOM IN MY BED!!! (i know it sucks)

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what did the dog say to the cat nothing because dogs can`t talk and if they could talk the cat wouldn`t understand him because cats can`t talk

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A duck walks into the bar, buys a beer, steals your woman, wins a bar fight, pistol whips a police officer, departs and shouts Aflac

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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