Buy a SHOTGUN!!!!

why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

69

There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

Why should you be concerned if you see a black midget with no arms and no legs falling off a building? He might get hurt.

What did the fish say when he swam into the wall? DAM!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

Why did the goose cross the road? Because the chicken was on vacation

The worst part of waking up, Is no Folgers in your cup.

What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

Q: What do you call a pig with wings? A: Pigs don't have wings.

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7,8,9

What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

what did the boy say to the over weight girl your fat

What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

Why did the clock say 10:30? It was a digital clock!

Ich bin nicht der Anführer

I slept through the Dark Knight movie....turns out I was pretty tired.

So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...