In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

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Why doesn't the farmer have a dog? He doesn't like dogs.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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If you say "Hi" to every tree you pass, is that being environmentally friendly?

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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A: Roses are red, Violets are blue. B: Then why are they called violets? A: I NEVER NOTICED THAT!

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is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

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Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

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A man offered a little boy a ride home. He drove the boy home where his father preceeded to beat him senseless.

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What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

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knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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I'm rick james bitch

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Want to hear a Joke? No.

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Why was the asain studing? Because he had a 59 in math and needed a C to tay on the footbal team.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What do you call a black person who was in the U.S. army and survived WWII? A veteran, considering he fought a war and is still alive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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