What's green and fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree, it'll kill you? A pool table.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. i have Alzheimer's, cheese on toast.

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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What do you call most people over 50 who aren't married. Divorced

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what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

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What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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What did one alligator say to the other alligator? Ear

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Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

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A red and blue penguin are taking showers. The red penguin can't find the soap so he yells down the hall to the blue penguin "Hey, where is my soap?" The blue penguin replies, "What do I look like a typewriter?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

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whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

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I found out I had asthma earlier today. I was breathless.

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An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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c======3

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops