which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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Why is a bird when it flies? Because the higher it goes the much.

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Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

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what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

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Whats black, blue, and red all over? A man who has just been severally beaten.

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Why did the bartender kick out the three jews at midnight? Because the bar closes at 11.

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Q. How do you make your neighbor mad? A. Run his kids over.

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Me either. Well, later. Later.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

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How do you make something disappear from your hand? Throw it somewhere that's out of sight,

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wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? This is no time to make insensative jokes you dick, Billy's on a hospital bed.

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antonio has a penis head.lol

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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How do you make a clown sad? Brutally murder his children.

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Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops