A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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To mama so old, she might die soon.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medication prescribed by her doctor.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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What do you do when you come across a dead baby? Add it to your collection.

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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He who laughs last gathers no moss.

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My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

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So Joe Paterno doesn't walk into a police station....

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Q. What did the woman use for vaginal medication? A. Standard Strength Vagisil.

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Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

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Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

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A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

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How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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Your Mom

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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a

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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