why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

This isn't funny.

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

"Knock knock." "Come in."

How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

A man walks into a bar. He was the barman. [L]

i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

Why did the chicken cross the road? For a legitimate reason

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, I died because I didn't have a heart.

Why do gingers get mad when people call them gingers? Because it hurts their feelings

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

Did you hear phonsi was Gay? I just found out too, he walked into the diner and said, "ive got AAIIIIIDS."

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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