So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I was diagnosed as criminally insane Wanna be my friend?

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

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A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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Why did the boy drop his icecream cone? Because of the shock of seeing his dead family.

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What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

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A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

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What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops