How long does it take for britney spears to change a light bulb? Fish can not leave the water without dieing.

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knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

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Why did whitney Houston become a drug addict? Because she made some very bad decisions in her life.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

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Why did the teenager crash his car? He had no arms

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My grandpa died in the holocaust. How? He had gas.

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Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

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What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Well i would imagine one of various names for a domesticated animal and she would choose the name based on her likes towards nature or an element of nature, being the educated individual she i would think she may name it base on a person of importance, such as an author or maybe a writer that inspires her.

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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So a guy with alsimers walks into a bar........I forget the rest.

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I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witnesses, can we have a moment of your time?

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How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

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When you see birds flying in a V why is one side of the V always longer than the other? There are more birds on that side

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Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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