Why are all the dinosaurs extinct? Because you touch yourself at night,

whats worst then geting a used condom put in your mouth geting wraped by mario then lugi

why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

Lol, okay you have made Nero of the clan of the Moralians the mighty laugh and go aww... Seriously, first of all, WHAT THE FUCK IS NAUSEUS? Secondly, okay its Ridge Racer, close enough, aww, seriously that sounds like the cutest thing, I mean did you bleed? DID YOU HARM YOURSELF! DELIGHTFUL... Moral: Seriously though, seeing you tilt over while playing a racing game, kinda cute, just put a pillow there next time you know just saying, because I play videogames, I cant go sexytime for hours without pumping some ADRENALINE INTO MY MIGHTY ROD OF STONEFLESH!

A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

What's black on top and white on the bottom? Half an oreo

What do you get when you hit a kid with a hockeystick? arrested.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender say, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The man continues to order a drink when he realises the comment was directed at the elephant standind behind him.

Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

What did the blonde say when she was asked what color her hair was ? Blonde.

There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

Guy 1: When your Justin Beiber af. Guy 2: What Guy 1: Do you mean

What's worse than eating half a worm? Eating somebody's brain.

What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

What do you call a white guy surrounded by 10 black guys? A friendly individual who cares nothing about racial differences and instead judges people based on character.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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