An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven they say nothing to eachother because they are muffins and cannot speak if they did they would most likely be taken by the US government and studied and assumed to be alien life forms but anyway the muffins were taken out later and presumably eaten

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? Dance Dance Revolution

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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Poker face

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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You sick fiend

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Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

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A man died in a sky-diving accident. What was the last thing that went through his mind before he died? His feet

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape the hen.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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An under aged girl walks into a bar. She couldn't have done so without a fake ID and early development.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Nothing, you heartless asshole.

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2 Scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for H20, and the second one asks for H20 too. They both enjoy a refreshing glass of water.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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