Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

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why did the child kill his mother because the child gave his mom AIDS

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What do you call someone who explores wild cave systems? A spelunker.

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Why don't men want to marry virgins? They are wary of women who are inexperienced and who they may be sexually incompatible with.

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A man walked in to a store and asked for four candles. The storeman brought some fork handles and placed them on the counter. The customer said "No... 'Four Candles' a rather amusing sketch performed by The Two Ronnies, a comedy double act in the 1970s."

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What did Ed Gein get at McDonalds? The corpse of a worker he killed by the dumpster and hauled back to his shack to hang up and gut like a deer.

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How do you offend a black person? Call him a nigger.

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How do you know when your sister's on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

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Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

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What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

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What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

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what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

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You are a special guy, and I mean that in a really sweet way, but a retard no. Synapses, tell me more please.

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how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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