What do you call a man floating in a pool with his arms chopped off? A murder victim.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you get when you cross scabies with genital warts? Krusty Krabs.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

One day a object is flying overhead in a city and a man in a crowd of pedestrians yells, "It's a bird!" another man yells, "It's a plane!" No one else says anything as they stare at the two men that had become so excited about a possibly seeing a bird or an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you get when u cross a owl and a bungy cord...........my ass

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I insist, you go ahead. See you around. how about in four six hours?

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what is the worst thing a priest could do to a little boy? brutally murder him

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What is white and black and red all over.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock Who's there? To To whom? No, its To Who now, since I married

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Are you gay. No. Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are Red Violets are blue I am an onlince predator Post your address in the comment EJ

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why aren't there any black flesh-colored bandages? Good question.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? As a matter of fact, I do. It goes: "Do I know any jokes about sodium hypobromite? NaBrO."

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why did the boy let go of his red ballon? Because he was hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops