Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with other men other than her husband.

What would Helen Keller say to Obama? Wow Im really impressed that you are our nation's first black president. You're doing a great job. Except it would come out like DUUUUURNNNNNAFMKAAAALLLL

Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar.... Homosexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual pandas just have piece? Man 1: Were the hell did you come from? Homosexual Panda: My mother's uterus same as you, retard.

Fool me once, shame on you Fool me twice, shame on me Fool me 3 times, oh now you're just being a jerk

Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

You can lead a horse to water, and you can pick your friends, but you can't sneeze with your eyes open.

Can yas all stfu SBBBBBBBBBSBSBSBSBSSBBSBSSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBBBBBB

Ok,here's one, my brother can sometimes do it! Ok. Think of a number between 1 and 10 Add ten Add ten Add ten Add five Add five Take away your original number \~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\ _______________________________________ Is your number NOW, 40? Was your original number 6? Click thumbs up if that WAS your answer! ????????

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe, When he woke up one night he discovered with fright, That the friendly old neighbor from next door had broken into his house with a chain saw in an alcohol-induced murder attempt.

Roses are red, pink, white or yellow. Stop stereotyping my arrogant fellow.

What did the little boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's jewish

Why did Lou Gehrig die from? ALS

what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

Why can't Roger drive a tractor? Because Roger is a goldfish

Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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