Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What did Jim do after the police gave him a ticket? He followed them home and used their children's limbs to rape them.

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A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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Lady gaga suposedly has a wener.What does that make her? A man

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Why can't Ray Charles drive? Because he's dead.

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What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

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Knock Knock: I have full blown AIDS

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why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide? you would too if your name was uuhuhuhduhh

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OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your pork? Finding half of a worm, because the worm you just ate is going to live in your stomach, breed, then come out your butt. Or the Apocalypse.

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Suddenly a wild bunny appears ::::::::::::(:oI)

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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I have a friend named Jay . But for short , he likes to be called J .

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Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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i am a dino. RAWR.

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A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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