What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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How do you blind an Asian? Rip out his eyeballs.

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- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

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Jewwy Jewstein

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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You know what they say about fat thumbs? They give a lot of accidental comment likes on statuses.

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smell the vitamin C

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What do you call a man who eats another man? An man eater.

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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the anti-joke.com joke was just like a normal joke. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

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Why did the girl throw away her hairspray? Because she realized the harmful contaminants emitted from the nozzle were expediting the deterioration of the ozone layer thus contributing to global warming.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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What was the little boys least favorite part of Christmas? Getting raped by his uncle.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

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how do demolish a building alkekwhakbar

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What did the man say when he was having sex with his wife? That feels quite good.

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whats sad about justin bieber getting hit by a car and dying ? I wasnt driving the car that hit him.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm color blind, How about you?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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