what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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A Native American walks into a casino. He wants to invest a protion of his earnings from his fortune 500 company into it because he believes it to be a profitable venture.

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

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How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

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What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

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Whats really down a black hole? I don't know...The last person to go down one never came back because he died of AIDS.

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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What's worst than getting hit by a car. -Getting hit by a truck.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, That's what they tell me because I'm blind.

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Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope, expectation and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going to venture into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there that Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down in the family's precious leather chair, looked her in the eye and whispered a sweet farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible, so now he is armed with the fact that his father is there for him, to help him further his adventure. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He grabbed his stash of Cool Original Doritos, took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena, got his Grandfather's lucky medallion and his inhaler and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, used the straw to puncture a hole through which to drink, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

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Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

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I have to tell yo people a story and you have to answer it. Q/S(Story):There once was a boy by the name of aids. He had aids because he had aids. He dad had aids, his mom had aids his whole family had aids. How did he die? A: He got hit by a bus you heartlest basterd.

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How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

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Why did the car crash? Because the driver was blind

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

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What did the boy with cancer get for his birthday? Roses on his tombstone.

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What do you get when you combine lemons, sugar and water? Lemons, sugar, and water

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That would mean that you are not its leader, or that you are, the result would have been the same, if you are the "head honcho" they would have gone for you, and your employees. Now, if you are an employee, they would have gone for your leader, and of course you. So between us and nobody else really its fucking antijoke, are you the leader?

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tiger woods played golf against peyton manning and yet tiger still cant win.

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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