Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Hi. P.S: You have aids. P.P.S: Purple penis pumpernickel pie puppets.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the bolt say to the wall?? nothing ,they just screwed.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A kid a jew and a child molester walk into a room . what happens next? Nothing there in a room.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are blue Violets are red I shot your valentine Straight in the head

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats worse than cutting yourself with scissors? Being forced into a blender by your baby's ghost.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Tall asians

thumb_up thumb_down +11

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

thumb_up thumb_down +11

knock knock who's there? A worm, your dead in a coffin.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

An American, a Mexican, and a black guy all walked into the same bar. Why did the 'BEWARE OF METAL BAR' sign have to be in japanese?!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops