Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

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i committed murder

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Q. What do you call a bashed black man laying on pavement? A. Neapolitan

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no rasist joks

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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Q: What happens when two planes both crush a tower in New York City? A: Bad news.

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FUCK YOU

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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What do you call dinosaur flatulence? Jurassic Fart!

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what is the worst thing a bout four black men driving a Cadillac off a cliff? they were my friends

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What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

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How many times have I said the word shingles? twelve.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

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Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

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What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot.

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how did a white girl have a black baby? she was raped at the age of thirteen.

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

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if you have a name/nickname/brand/version or number, please like this anti joke

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What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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