A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

Why has there never been a Mexican on the moon? Because Mexico's government funding for their space program is insufficient to take them all the way to the moon.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

A rapist, black guy, and a homophob walk into a bar and the bartender says nice game last night kobe.

What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... However, it's really busy, so they leave and go to a different bar.

whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

why did hitler hate the jews... because the nazies had to pay the gas bill

Inbreeding is really funny if you think about...

What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

How many Jews can fit in a Volkswagen beetle? Four, although five is possible if you are not afraid of getting a ticket.

What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

noah is a scrub jungle

Why cant stevie wonder read? Because he is blind

She loves me, she dosn't love me, she loves me, the girl walks up to the man and says, she doesn't love me

10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

meatspin.fr

How do you put 4 elephants inside a Volkswagen? You'd have to the change the interior design of the car and probably cut most of the roof. How do you put a Giraffe inside a Volkswagen? You ask her nicely to squeeze in between the four elephants...

what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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