What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

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Why did the city disappear? Someone nuked it

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Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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why did the chicken cross the world becuase he had to go in the bathroom

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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whats the sad part of 4 negroes driving off a cliff? the car couldve fit 5

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What did the rock say to the tree. It didn't say anything, rocks don't talk.

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How did Alice get revenge on Diane when Diane called her fat? When Alice was pregnant, she stabbed herself in the stomach and blamed it on Diane. Diane was then sent to prison for murder and received a sentence of 25 years. Alice laughed in court, and Diane was forced to commit suicide. Alice then stole Diane's husband, and she lived happily ever after.

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What's the best Anti-Joke ever? I don't know, but it's NOT this one.

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chuck norris won the world series of poker using his superior knowledge of counting cards and calculating probability.

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"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

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What do you call a cat that growls? A cat

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Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

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a duck was clearing out his apartment when he came across a rat. the rat turned into a genie. 'i will grant you 3 wishes' said the genie. 'whats the catch?' replied the duck 'can i touch your dinkle?'

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Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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When life gives you lemons, you must also have a proportionally sufficient amount of both water and sugar in order to make lemonade.

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a man checks his brand new cellphone to see if he has a text message... He has cancer

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Which ballet do pigs like best? Pigs don't understand ballet, but they probably like the ones with audience participation, as they are friendly animals and enjoy interacting with humans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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