Q. What did the barber say to the Italian kid? A. Do you want your hair cut or should I just change the oil.?

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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Where do drunk asians live? In their house or apartment with their families, who are concerned about his drinking.

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Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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Q: Whats worse than spilling milk? A: Cancer Q: Whats worse than cancer? A: Rebecca Black

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Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

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Roses are red violets are blue i have HIV you should probably get yourself checked...

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why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, Gee, I wish I could partake in even the first two lines of this stanza, but alas, I have colourblindness.

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

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Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

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What's the difference between a black man and a couch? One is a human being and one is a piece of furniture.

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When's the best time to kill a black man? Never. Committing murder is a felony and constitutes as highly immoral.

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How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

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Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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A woman went for a midnight jog. She's been missing for 12 years now.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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