Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a black man on the moon? Another successful moon landing by NASA in which the African-American astronaut went on a successful moon walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happens if you fall of a cliff You die

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q. What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A. Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's big fat and hairy? Peter

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Man U

thumb_up thumb_down +8

u know whats a crime? rape

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Where can you find a tetraplegic? Where you left him.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did goldilocks say to the three bears? she was savagely murdered before she could say anything.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why are there no tablets in the jungle? A: The pharmaceutical logistics involved would be enormous and would make very little business sense.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops