Roses are red, violets are blue.. Oh i can't finish joke coz i gotta go poo ! :/

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What's pink, bubbly, and goes round and round? A baby in a microwave.

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Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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what did the super popular, beautiful girl say to her stalker? i dont know, i wasnt the stalker.

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T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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If you were a pie I'd eat you

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Or so the tell me, Because I'm Blind

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What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 6 feet under the ground? Doug What do you call a guy with no arms and legs buried 3 feet under the ground? Douglas

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

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A wild Snorlax appeared crushing several members of the community

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What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

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What is worse than torture? Not much.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust No, the Holocaust never even happened, you're an idiot.

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roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

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Your adopted

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what do u call blue fluff? blue fluff

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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how how does a black man jump. the same way anyone else does

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A twelve year old play Minecraft. He never made any friends. What did you expect?

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Why did the Nun refude to say Thank You Father? Because she was raped by her father as a child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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