whats flat and useless? the walls of an abandoned house where land prices are increasing and properties are in high demand

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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Q:What's the greatest part about having sex with twenty five year old girls? A: There's 20 of them

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Why did the Chinese family eat a dog? Because they were poor and starving refugees.

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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Q: Why Cant The T-Rex Clap? A: No, Its Not Because His arms are to short, Its because he's Dead You Idiot...

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Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

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What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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Patient: Doctor, doctor! I feel like a pair of curtains! Doctor: That's because you are. Patient: Wow, I need to lay off the mushrooms.

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why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

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What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

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If you see Chuck Norris you should probably tell him hey for me.

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Yo Mama's so fat Everyone is very concerned for her Health.

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? The Johnson Family was then heard on the morning news for letting a murderer into their home before being brutally killed.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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