Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? No one knows, he didn't leave a note.

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what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Cancer. Super Cancer.

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Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

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Why can't the Asian do math? He has down-syndrome.

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Two muffins in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says nothing, because muffins cannot talk.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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So the question i got asked in order to post this was: Which one is easiest? and I thought to myself, the slutty one, obviously!!

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Why was six afraid of seven? The world may never know.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

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Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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how many black men did it take to steal from the whitehouse? Obama.

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Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

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Q: What do you call a room full of black people? A: A Social Gathering.

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11/9 Americans won't get this joke.

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I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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