Why did the Jew lock the chest? Because that's where he was hiding the body.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

Why did Lou Gehrig die from? ALS

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

Are tomatoes more scary than onions? No. They are not more scary than onions.

i found waldo.

Q: What do you call a black person who got hit by a truck? A: Dead

Good job, son.

What did Grandma Sally give Little Timmy for Christmas? Herpes

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

Texas! You are doing it the wrong way! Learn from Hitler, gas is cheaper.

Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

Yo Momma is SO FAT, THAT she has an increased risk of cardiac arrest due to her blood pressure.

a man walks into a library Who the hell reads

don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

Why did the boy drop his ice cream cone? Because he got hit by a bus.

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ now I know my ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ no I know my ABC etc:

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...