How do you make a boy cry? Pour hot soup on his head.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

my friend said this website was funny, you know what i said?.... its really not!

What does a black man do when drives up to a STOP sign? Stops.

This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

what do you call 3 black men in a line up? their names

Knock knock who's there? the police, your under arrest the police your under arrest who? BAM! sir, I'm placing you under arrest for the murder of your wife, anything you say or do can be used against you. IT WASN'T ME!!!! yeah yeah tell it the judge

How do you make a tissue dance? You give it dance lessons.

Why did the boy with one arm have no friends? He was a cereal killer from Ireland.

How high is the grass in Germany? Approximately the same height as the grass in America.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

A:Knock Knock B:It's open

Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

knock knock who's there? I'm here.

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

rawrrrrrrrrrrr

Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

What do you do when you see a person sleeping at a bus stop? You fart on their head

How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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