Pickles are moist.

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What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat whore.

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I DO NOT CARE ABOUT NOVA! MY NAME IS VIKTOR REZNOV! AND I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

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What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

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Knock Knock No solicitors

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Why don't black people listen to country music Because every time they here hoe down the think there wife just got shot No sorry for anybody who's black I luv ya don't think twice I have thirty blk friends

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

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Knock Knock. Who's there? [no one] After that day, Dave moves out of the house assuming that a ghost knocked on his door.

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Why wasn't Kevin Love able to draw a perfect circle. Because, he just wasn't able to get the job done

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Ok so a black guy is packing his bags for college and then......... wait a minute?

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what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a wh0re.

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There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

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How many skilled union workers does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Once a upon a time there were three kittens that die, the end :D

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

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A woman is terminally ill in the hospital and her family is trying to decide what her last meal should be. Her older sister suggests tea and the idea is accepted enthusiastically. The other sister suggests making jasmin tea and the ill woman's son also suggests toast. The woman's husband looks down at the orange he had just peeled for his wife and looks up at the rest of them. moments later he shoots the three of them and then himself. All were found dead. http://www.dispatch.com/content/stories/local/2012/01/11/food-tiff-ends-in-deaths.html

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Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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