What poops,smells bad,burps,wears diapers,farts,and screams spank me with a bib on That Depends what you do on saturday nights

what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

what did a ginger say to god? nothing gingers dont have souls and therefore cant go to heaven

Why did the two children go sledding? Because they liked to sled.

Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

Q: What's the difference between a black man from San Diego and a white man from Miami? A: They live in different cities, and in the presidential election, the black man voted for Obama and the white man voted for McCain

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

A man named Hank, from Idaho takes a trip to Michigan. When he arrives, he rents a house and starts a meth lab. Hank is spending 7 years in jail. Hank was charged with stealing.

what did the lesbian do with the other lesbian? played badminton

How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

What's red and smells like cherries. Cherries

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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