Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. He was stapled to the baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A horse walks into a bar and begins to moo. Everyone is confused until it takes off its costume and reveals it's just a cow.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

karn chevalier

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a chicken that can't lay eggs? a rooster

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you stop a black man from drowning? Through him a survival buoy

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

When it comes ro the zodiac my grandmother was a cancer and... She ws killed by... A giant crab

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a blind guy in a library? Kevin. Unless his name isn't Kevin.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse does not answer because he is a horse, and neither speaks nor understands the english language. He looks around, and is confused by his surrondings. He gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How do you get santa to stop delivering presents? Kill your parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the boy let go of his red ballon? Because he was hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why would Obama like to be ahead of some guy's poll and bent over at the same time? Because being ahead in someone's poll is encouraging news for his election campaign and bending over is part of the exercise program he uses to stay in shape.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops