did you know r kelly and jay z had a album together?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

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why did sally fall of the swing? because she had no arms... knock knock? (whos there) not sally

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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What's green and fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A Pool Table.

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Why didn't the lttle boy fasten his seatbelt? It doesn't matter, it's too late now.

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

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why did the Chicken Cross the Road? Why must you question a Chicken's motives to Cross the Road?

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Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were no traffic.

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What happens when you cut a body in half? An erection.

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

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Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Q: Why didn't the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

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That awkward momment when there is no Candy in the Van... <3

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A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

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why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops