What does "Ford" stand for? Nothing. It's the name of the company founder, not an acronym.

Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

What did the shark say to the beached whale? Nothing.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

Q. What do black people, Asians, and Irishmen call their moms? A. "Mom"

What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

A blonde keeps walking down her driveway to her mailbox.Finally, her neighbor asks, "Why?" The blonde replies, "The computer says I've got mail."

What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

What do mario and luigi have in common They are both plumbers

Why did the cow fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second cow fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first cow.

Why can't you lie to atoms? Because they make up everything!

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

How fast can you paint a fence with babies? Depends how fast you can throw them.

One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...