alert("Hello");

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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Have you heard the one about the dead guy? Neither has he.

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Your mother is so fat that when she goes to the movies, she usually orders popcorn and maybe a drink.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

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Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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the WNBA.

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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Q: How do you confuse a blond A: You don't they are born that way

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Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

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Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops