What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

whats hard long and has cum in it cucumber

Roses are red, Violets are purple.

Q: What's the difference between a bird and a fly? A: A bird can fly, but a fly can't bird.

Q- Why? A- Why not?

Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

A: Knock Knock B: 7

Your momma's so fat, that her doctor recommends that she exercises regularly and sticks to a healthier diet that includes foods with nutritional value.

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

Roses are red Violets are blue classic

A mother is sitting with her son at the park. A nearby man suddenly breaks into uncontrollable coughing. The mother leans over to her son and whispers, 'Smoker's cough.' The son never takes up smoking.

Q: why is there always a window in front of the kitchen sink A: so when the woman is washing the dishes she can see the grass she is about to cut

Two Cows are knitting soda water in a lightbulb. One of them said: Talking about milk, what time is it? The other pulls out a thermometer, looked at it and said: Wednesday.

What did the mother do when she found out the baby was stillborn? Gave it a proper burial, grieved for months and became a shell of her former self.

Yo moma so fat, it ain't even funny. Seriously. She is suffering real diabetes! Do you know how that feels? I though so...

Knock Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock! Knock! Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad this joke is over?

Two tomatoes were crossing a road when one of them got hit by a truck. The other said, Carrot.

Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

"Never trust what the internet says." - Abraham Lincoln

What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender who recently got out of federal prison after a 20 year sentence.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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