There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry." "No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away." "I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

Micheal Curran...that is all.

why did 9/11 poop on a condominium? fuk

What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

whats the difference between friends and cement? if you soak friends in liquid and then repeatadly shock them they will die

How about that airline food?

Why did the elderly lady cross the road? Because an atomic bomb was exploding behind her

Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

Yo momma so fat, when she runs she makes the cd played skip, at the radio station!!!

Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

Why didn't my marriage work out? Because I married a tangerine.

A white guy and a black guy are sitting in a bar. The white guy apologizes to the black guy for the hundreds of years of slavery endured by his people.

Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

what is worse than falling off a bridge? .. getting pushed off a bridge

Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

A girl and her friend got into a fight. They both bled to death.

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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