Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

Knock knock. Who is there? My wife. My wife who? My wife is a prostitute, selling her own body for money so we can afford drugs for my son who has cancer.

A man walks into a bar so how many Jews were there when a man called Wellard ate a pizza. Balloons

An Irishman walks into a bar.....Duh.

Knock knock Fuck off!

The camp counselor woke me up, and said that it was going to be a long week. I didn't worry though, since all weeks are 7 days long.

What's worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

What's red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and purple? The Color Wheel.

Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

Why did Harriet Tubman have to take the underground railroad? Because she was a fugly slut.

How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

A gay man kisses a gay man and therefore is considered gay.

lil billy wuz killed cuz of hiz relijuz beliefz

theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

BOYS ARE DUMB AND THEY SMELL FUNNY AND IM ANGRY

A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You pour cold water on her head or make a loud noise nearby.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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